Tuesday, August 12, 2014

The Urban Escape, Part I

Author's note: Consider this a replacement for Monday's lack of a post.  More to come tomorrow!

Ugh.  I can't stand this any more.  I have just got to get out of here.

Sure, it was nice when I first took the job.  Decent pay, a cushy office chair, a cubicle of my own to decorate with pictures of all those places I hope to someday be able to afford to go, and a computer with unfettered internet access.  What could be better?

Fast forward a couple of months, now, and that's all gone sour.  The pay never lasts as long as I want, my chair makes a super annoying squeaking sound, my cubicle feels more like a prison cell, and my computer faces the entrance.  I go on a site not related to the company, and anyone who walks by my office can see it.

And oh, those people.  My god.

You know what?  I'm taking a half day.  I've decided, just now.  Feel that chill in the air?  No?  Maybe it's just me.  My throat is just really scratchy today.  Ugh, I just feel like I need to cough, but I don't, you know what I mean?

Yep, definitely getting out of here early.

Computer's shut down.  Files in briefcase, so I can claim to be "getting work done from home while recovering."  Hah, like that's gonna happen.  Coat.  Keys.  Make sure little African Violet plant has enough water.  Check.

Now, for the escape...

Peek out the cubicle.  Left.  Right.  Okay, coast is clear.  Time to move. Remember, keep low.  The walls are low enough so that I'll be spotted if I straighten up.  Keep my back bent, head down like a good drone, and I'm invisible.  Coming up on the corner.  Turn left-

"Oh, Barry!  Where you headed?  Getting lunch already - it's a bit early, isn't it?  Are you meeting someone?  Who is it?"

Crap.

To be continued...

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